The death of a loved one is the greatest stressor that we face. It can generate sadness, anger, and anxiety, and interfere with our concentration, sleep and appetite. Combine that with parenting, arguably the hardest and most stressful job in the world, and you get a grieving process that is particularly difficult. In my therapy practice, many clients in the midst of grief have described moments when they’d rather be crying alone than warming up a bottle for their baby, feeding their toddler for what seems like the 17th time that day, or doing any of the other daily responsibilities required of them. Maybe you’ve been there too. Doesn’t it feel harder to soothe your child during a meltdown when you, yourself, are in distress? Maybe it’s when you finally get around to brushing your teeth at 2 PM that you wonder: How do I care for myself while ensuring my children are cared for too? Is it okay for me to not be okay around my children? How do I explain this to them without scaring–or scarring–them?